Last week when i was at a house party, i drank way to much
this horny chick dried gettingin my pants.
 
 as a good Christian man, i refused twice. but the thirdtime,
 
i rushed into the bathroom with her, stripped her of all her belongings, and had intercourse with her while sitting on the toiletseat.
 
after a few strokes, […]

i’ve masturbated drunk and high in the colorado river… during a lightning storm.