When I was 19 I hooked up with a 43 year old man I met online.

He was married, with kids. We would go to cheap hotels with mirrored ceilings. The kind that rent by the hour. I was practically a virgin.

Only had sex once before, and that guy was just…bad. J, however, truely awoke me sexualy. I had my first orgasm with him.

He taught me a lot about BDSM play, and helped me to become very empowered and confident in my sexuality. There were nights that we’d just sit up and talk for hours. I owe a lot to him.

I know how lucky I was to meet someone that was so good to me, and good for me, in such a fashion. Our relationship lasted a couple years, but eventually faded. I hear from him about once a year, just checking in to see how my world is.

I hope he is well. Perhaps he’s found himself another young plaything.